I’m Just a Stepmom Being Stalked by The Joker
I was reading along through the posts in a stepmom group and a co-parenting group I also belong to and started reading off all the, “I feel like I’m losing my mind” and “I can’t take it anymore” and “will this ever end?” and the other cry for help posts, to my husband.
He said: “Yeah that’s because it’s like you’re being stalked by The Joker and you’re not Batman. You have no rich guy financial backing, you have no bat gadgets, you have no body armor, you have no Alfred, you have no Robin and the worst part is the children in your life love the crazy clown that is terrorizing you and thinks this is all just normal.
”Best analogy I’ve ever heard for the extreme line crossing hostility of HCBM. And the more ethical (Batman-like) you are the more crazed they become about taking you down.
Of course, in our situation, we have a supervillain type of extreme HCBM, not just a rachet-azz freeloader that creates constant annoyance and unnecessary problems, so that analogy may sound excessive to some of you.
But I will respectfully submit, that cumulative stress over time, of constant pressure from a negative outside influence, is just as painful and trauma-inducing as big grandiose, waaaay over the top attacks. Most of us are experiencing some combination of the two, and in rapid succession.
What I want to affirm here is, that ALL our suffering and struggling is major and impactful to each of us, no matter what the details of our individual stories. We are all feeling at the end of our rope, no matter what our unique circumstance, and this is our common bond here. We are not Batman, so we need community and new knowledge, if we are to engage with any success at all, in an epic-super-villain-obsession-based battle we didn’t start, we don’t want and some of us would do anything to make The Joker just stop.
For the rest of you, that think you are Batman, I’m here to tell ya, ya ain’t sis, ya just are not.
You can’t do this alone, with a flimsy bathrobe belt and the flyswatter as your weapons of choice. That’s not gonna cut it. But we can get ourselves a utility belt of resources and build a stronger community of stepmom support.
The stepmoms have had it!
And the time has come to unite and block that Joker from having one ounce of our life force, just to feed their fixation and unraveling mental state. The common theme: The Jokers only short-sighted goal is to get Batman to react with emotion, and he is so unhinged he will injure and even snap his own neck to get his twisted satisfaction.
Check out the animated feature, Frank Miller’s “The Dark Knight Returns” part 2 for a very graphic and deep psychological example of this fixated way of orientating one’s life and why these clowns push so hard to get us to lose control.
Their twisted way of processing life, makes them feel they gain extra control when they get us to give them ours. They think false control is authentic power, which it will never be.
And they think there is a finite amount of power as if it were pie, and if we get our slice from our own pie, then they somehow get less of their own pie. They think there is only one pie. There isn’t.
Now that I’ve thoroughly mixed all kinds of metaphors in this post, I’ll stop.
Because I know how to do that. I’m not a vigilante in a bat costume and I no longer play into the jokers plans. I am just a stepmom, but I have set myself free.
And I now have energy available to help others dealing with their own super-villain struggles.
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