The Dead End Realtionship Norm vs Living REAL Love

Much of my private session work revolves around helping men and couples gain access to the education and resources they will require in order move out of obligation based monogamy, into desire based monogamy.

I barrow heavily from the latest research on the anatomy of lasting relationships, hopeful way-showing  inspirational books like “Spiritual Partnerships” by Gary Zukav and of course, my own data collection over 20 years of talking to and advising men that have found themselves in declining attraction relationships.

One of my favorite books to recommend to singles and couples is  “The Future of Love” by Daphne Rose Kingma. So much so, that I have created a study guide video series that I make available in all my online courses for men, women and couples.

In chapter 2, she discusses relationships as social conventions and a new perspective on how we can begin moving into a better way.

She offers a vision of a new norm where we can access deep inner motivation, at a soul level, so we have the emotional rocket fuel required to start and keep us activated in desire toward creating amazing bonds in fully awake partnerships. 

She points out that in our society, legally bound resource sharing marriage must be the goal if we are to fit into the relationship norm of the general population.

Additionally, the study of developmental psychology will remind us to ever underestimate our survival instincts sub conscious need and drive to feel a sense of belonging with the larger tribe.

With this in mind, and given the obvious social/emotional pull toward legal marriage in our culture, we can draw the conclusion that the overwhelming sub conscious social message we have all been soaked in our whole lives is…. if you want to be loved you have 4 options:

1. You can be legally married

2. You can be waiting to be legally married

3. You can be a person who has suffered divorce and is subsequently waiting to be re-married

4. Or, god forbid, you can be a person who is single and was never “blessed” with the opportunity to marry in the first place.

It isn’t considered socially acceptable to hold a desire not to be married or even to choose to not to be in a relationship. This set of dysfunctional limiting beliefs is entrenched in collective unconscious layers of constant social programming we have been bombarded with since childhood.

Meeting or missing the mark on this social norm standard has become the way we both inspire ourselves and beat ourselves up. Highs and lows like an emotional roller coaster. Who can be constructive while on a roller coaster?

the future of love amazon cover

Click Start Prezi in the center of the video then use the arrows  ^^^ to navigate the flow chart or click on the dial icon in the lower right hand corner and set to your desired speed to automate the video.

It is also a huge stumbling block to creating lasting attraction and sexual fulfillment in long term relationships.

The video presented here (one in a series) covers only a tiny portion of what we must first acknowledge if we are to make any progress on upgrading the future of relating/mating/dating.

It is all about understanding how attraction works and the type of predictably that kills it, over and over, in relationship after relationship.

It is about finding the balance between getting the practical work of daily life accomplished without accidentally, inadvertently killing passion and the sexy in our intimate relationships.

It requires conscious choice, education and proper support to make the leap form the old broken way to the new and improved way.

Watch this …..

Click Start Prezi in the center of the video then use the arrows  ^^^ to navigate the flow chart or click on the dial icon in the lower right hand corner and set to your desired speed to automate the video.

If you are interested in learning more, here are some points of connection:

Motivated Men Start Here >>>
Core Lessons for Every Man’s Journey with Women

Progressive Women Start Here >>>
The Love Men UP Project 


Conscious Couples Start Here >>>
Becoming a Leveled UP Couple

Watch the next video in the series here >>>> Video 3

Michelle Terrell has been a health and wellness coach since 1995. In those years she collected data and the real life testimonials of thousands of good men who were feeling lost and confused in their love lives.

Her workshop students dubbed her The Pistol Whip Hippie because her teaching/coaching style is irreverent, in your face and radically honest (the Pistol Whip part) with the follow up being supportive, nurturing awakened energy (the Hippie part) that inspires men to strive to be their very best.

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